Sunday, August 10, 2014

Our Perfect Blonde Angel.....


One week into being foster parents, things were a bit rocky.  Out sweet Little Lady was having a difficult time, she was teething, settling into an unfamiliar home, had a few restless nights, and her first foster care well baby appointment was upon us….and wouldn’t you know she needed a few shots.   She cried so hard that the entire office could hear her.  She had some strong vocal cords for such a Little Lady. 

She cried and would not stop no matter what I did to comfort her.  We got into my mommy van and as we pulled into our neighborhood she stopped crying and fell to sleep.  I drove right by our home and kept driving.  We had a few hours before we had to be home for a visit with our agency case worker so I decided to take a drive around our city.  We drove and drove….and I let her sleep, finally.

The time that we HAD to be home was getting close so we headed back.  By the time our case worker arrived Little Lady’s mood was better but still a bit fussy.  She rested in her swing as our case worker and I chatted and started on paper work.

As we sat in the den working I heard ducks. (Please see this post for info on back story)  I was a bit confused since that is the ring tone for our agency and a representative of our agency was in my home.  I do not know what made me answer the phone, I mean it was actually kind of rude since I had a guest, but I answered.  I was being called for a placement.  Let me back up to say that I had gotten a few more placement calls since Little Lady had been in our home…but none felt right or I did not call back in time to get the info.

The voice on the other end was the agency Program Manager (everyone there seems to take and make calls) she said she knew I was getting settled with Little Lady but wanted to tell me about another baby.  This baby was a little 8 month old girl who needed a place to stay.  I was told all family and other options had been exhausted.  Since we are a foster to adoption home, this sounded good.  I got a few more details, that I cannot share, and I said “bring her home”.

When I told our case worker what was going on she asked, “Are you sure?  Are you crazy?”  I had just told her about the rough time Little Lady and I were having.  Their ages were so close, a 5 month old and an 8 month old!?!?! I was sure.  Something just felt right in agreeing to care for her.  Our case worker agreed and said it sounded promising that this baby might stay forever.  Of course we never know that to be true, the goal is always reunification.

Fast forward to later that evening and a beautiful blond hair, blue eye angel came to my door.  We call her “Blondie”.

When I opened the door I felt immediate love.  The man on the porch held the most beauitiful fair skin, blonde hair baby with big blue eyes...like a sparkling saphire blue that you can get lost in. She was scared but not crying. All she had on was a thin onesie that had holes and smelled of smoke.  I wanted to get her inside and into something more comfortable.  The first thing I found was a clean, Texas A&M, thick soft onesie. So I put that on her and a nice warm pair of socks. 

Meanwhile, the CPS worker who brought her home was bringing in boxes and armfuls of belonging.  I still get very emotional when I think this was everything she owned….well except the “play pen” (as the CPS worker called it) that she slept in, it did not fit in his car.  When Little Lady came, she had a bag of clothes, like she was staying a few days.  Blondie had everything she “owned”, like she was not going back. 

We are her first Foster Care home but she had been in multiple homes over the last few months as her parents could not care for her.  Remember, she was only 8 months old at the time.  It is hard to tell the entire story when there are so many details we cannot share…. But just know that she was scared and tired.  But she was well fed as she was much bigger than I thought she would be.  Compared to Little Lady, just a few months younger, she was a big girl.  Not fat, just big.  I even asked if they were sure she was 8 months old. 

We started to get settled in, remember Little Lady (the 5 month old) was still with us, at this time.  We were thinking about what we needed for TWO babies and what we had.  Well, we only had one car seat, one stroller….so David, my hubbie, headed out to get another car seat (we actually had a car seat and stroller we were borrowing from my brother and SIL, but it was a single stroller).  When he came back, he not only had a new carrier and car seat but a double stroller….the exact one I wanted. 

I do not know if Blondie was just exhausted or used to being in so many homes, she did not put up a fuss.  She played with us, a little cautiously but not really guarded.  She ate well.  She loved watching Little Lady, and wanted to love on her….but she did not know her own strength so we could not let her play too much. It being so late in the evening, when she came, it wasn’t long before bedtime.  She and Little Lady were pretty good roomies.  They both slept well…esp Little Lady who I think was used to sharing a room with her brother and sister.

In fact, they were both so easy going that we took them out to the mall that weekend to test out the new double stroller.  They just chilled in their seats and enjoyed being out.  We saw the Easter Bunny and got their pic taken.  That was a big surprise as I had not thought about it being so close to Easter.

We had so many visitors in and out of the home, meeting the girls.  I am not sure, looking back, that it was a good thing or not.  Some experts say not to have a lot of visitors so the baby can bond with mommy and daddy…but everyone was so excited to meet them…and the babies seemed to enjoy it, too. 

Blondie had a yuckie rash and other skin problems when she arrived. I had talked to our Foster Care Clinic but they did not seem concerned and just said to go to the ER if it got bad.  We had an appt coming up for her first visit, so they just did not seem to think we needed to come in sooner.  I kept a close eye on it and used rash ointment, we used very strict cautions so there was no cross contamination.  By Sunday afternoon I just could not deal with not really knowing and we took a trip to the ER. Foster children have medical covered so might as well take advantage of it.  Also, David had been inventorying her belonging s and came across some cream in a bag….I am not going to disclose what it was but dealing with it in my past, while working in an Alzheimer’s community, I just wanted make sure we had this under control.

So we spent most of Sunday evening in the ER.  The nurses were so nice and the babies were pretty relaxed.  I think Little Lady just slept thru it.  Ok…so Blondie was relaxed until they started examining her.  She did not want me to put her down.  We were already getting pretty attached and she trusted me.  She had to lie down and be still, something to this day she still does not like.  I let her play with my necklace and that seemed to calm her down….give her something else to focus on.  We made a joke that something shiny from Tiffany and Co always makes a girl happy. The nurses doctored her up, we got a diagnosis of what the rash was (and it wasn’t the icky thing the cream was for, that had already cleared up), and a prescription.  We gladly said thank you and good bye.  We had our first ER visit and it wasn’t that big of a deal, it could have been worse.

The next week was exhausting but I felt so blessed.  There were some sleepless nights; I will not fib on that….but the babies were in a strange home, sleeping in a strange room….with another strange baby.  It was one of those feeling of exhaustion that you welcome it kind of things, if that makes sense.  Mommies understand what I mean. 

On Thursday, after 2 weeks of being her Foster Family, we had to say Good Bye and God Bless to our Little Lady.  She was a sweet heart but she was going to live with her Grandma, Grandpa, big brother and sister.  We were going to miss her but were very happy for her reunification. 

And now Blondie was an only child.  We decided to focus our energy and love on this little angel.  She seemed to need some attention and we had plenty to give.  We were called several times over the next few weeks about placements and always passed.  I finally asked that they just give us some time to spoil Blondie and enjoy her.  When we agreed to be licensed for two it was supposed to be if they were siblings, so it wasn’t really a big deal.  I love the idea of two but not right now.

Over the last few months we have kept pretty busy.  We have enjoyed lots of family events.  My sister, Krazy Krystal and BFF Cathy threw a fun “Welcome to Foster Parenthood Shower” for me and Blondie was the center of attention.  It was so cool that the baby was there at the shower.

 I also celebrated my very first Mother’s Day as a mommie.  Blondie and David made me breakfast (cinnamon rolls) and had a card from David AND one from Blondie waiting on me when I woke up.  I got presents, too…a charm from Tiffany’s of a little girl silhouette and a Louis Vuitton Neverfull MM in Azure (to be my summer mommie bag…which I LOVE!!!!).  We hosted a Mother’s Day lunch at our home and everyone came.  We had David’s Yummy, award winning, homemade jambalaya. I had been feeling so sad on the last few Mother’s Days that this was a big deal to me.  I was finally a mommie, too.

 We celebrated Father’s Day, too, which was a lot of fun.  Blondie and I took off shopping on the Saturday before to hunt for the perfect gifts (they had been planned for a while but I could not find the perfect frame). We gave David cards, made breakfast, and gave him cigars and a big photo collage frame with several photos we took of Blondie in the Bluebonnets (for him to hang in his new office).  We took Daddy out for dinner at his favorite place, Bone Daddy’s House of Smoke.  David has a daughter, Victoria, who is in her 20s, but we do not see her often.  I always make a big deal about Father’s Day for him with a card, gift, and dinner out…but this was so fun having a baby to celebrate with us.

We went on quite a few outings.  David and I always take a trip to the BLuebonnet Trails in April, we really enjoyed taking BLondie and getting some great pictures. We got Family Memberships to the Dallas Zoo and went several times before it got too hot.  Blondie loved riding in her stroller and seeing the animals.  She especially enjoyed when Jordan (17 year old niece) and Ayden (4 year old cousin) went with us. When Krazy Aunt Krystal was on vacation we went to the Dallas Aquarium and saw the sharks and flamingos.  We also went shopping and out to lunch a few times while Krystal was off of work.  We went swimming at Mimi’s house a few times and Blondie enjoyed it so much we decided to have her Birthday Party as a Pool Party / Luau. 

At the first of July we welcomed Baby Lucca, my nephew, into the world.  Now Blondie has a cousin just a year younger.  I hope they get to grow up together, picking on each other and playing, becoming  best friends. 

We have celebrated many firsts with our sweet little Blondie.  We were told, when she arrived, that she did not crawl.  We witnessed the “first” time she crawled.  We cheered her on to her first steps.  We celebrated her first Birthday…..OH and did we CELEBRATE!!!!

To be continued….

XO

Tiffany

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